I have been quite busy putting together the final touches for an amazing Master Mind Your Business Program (what? You don’t know about Masterminding? Have you heard of Napoleon Hill’s book, “Think and Grow Rich?! Go here right now to learn more!).Now, if you don’t know about Masterminding, let me tell you, you are missing out on a powerful spiritual boost.

You know how the bible says “Where two or more are gathered in my name, there I am in the midst of them.” (Matt 18:19-20)? People have been using that principle for years, centuries! It’s how Charles Wrigley created the Wrigley empire, how Ford popularized the automobile industry, and how many entrepreneurs today are creating unprecedented results in their businesses.

In most of the Mastermind groups I have participated in or facilitated, the number one obstacle to creating the business/relationship/wealth/(insert your dream here) of your dreams is never the external obstacle itself.

It’s fear.

Fear of rejection. Fear of the worst possible scenario. Fear of success. Fear of failure. Fear that it might not work out. Fear that it might after all. Fear that it’s too much work. Fear that I’m wrong. Fear that I’m right. Fear. Fear. Fear!

Usually, fear is the LAST MONSTER to overcome before you achieve extraordinary breakthroughs. When you come face to face with your fear, you have two options: You can either stop, turn around, walk away and try a different route (usually, a different version of the same schpeel). Or you can step right through it.

I’m willing to assert that fear is just the unwillingness to look at evidence that proves our point. Here’s what I mean: When you are afraid of rejection, in your mind, you have already been rejected. And insofar as you are already experiencing the feeling/thought of being rejected, fear is just the hesitation to “make it official.”

So, here’s my suggestion:

Go ahead. Make it official!

You’re already feeling rejected! So go ahead and be rejected for real!

The other possibility is that you might experience acceptance, love, success, even if it’s “incremental”.

We might meet the perfect mate, and then come face to face with fears we may not have even realized you had. And we sabotage it in the most subtle and sneaky of ways: We make it THEIR problem: S/he lives too far away, is too busy, has too much attention from the opposite sex anyway, is a commitment-phobe anyway, etc. Or else, we make ourselves the convenient villain, justifying all the reasons why such a decent human being shouldn’t get involved with a monster such as I.

When in reality, what we are covering up is “Wow, I’m feeling really vulnerable here and if this person rejects me, I’m going to feel very hurt.”

Here’s how I coached someone on this recently, and how I invite YOU to re-frame whatever current situation may be generating fear in you now:

1) What are you afraid might happen?

I’m afraid that if I go for this business deal, it might not work out and I’ll end up losing my investment money.

2) And if it happens, what might it mean about you?

That I don’t know what I’m doing. That I’m not a good business owner/investor, and that I’m too stupid to make good decisions.

3) Is that absolutely true? Do you have evidence of the opposite?

No. It’s not absolutely true. There are plenty of times when I’ve made great decisions and it turned out wonderfully. This opportunity wouldn’t have come to me if the person hadn’t trusted that I have solid experience and know what I’m doing.

4) Who would you be without this train of thought?

Oh, wow! I’d be free, I’d feel certain, confident in my own abilities, happy that opportunities come to me apparently out of nowhere. It means I must be doing something right.

5) So if you were that person: the free, certain, confident person for whom opportunities just seem to flow, what would your train of thought be, and what actions would you take?

….

You get where I’m going… If you don’t, email me so you can experience coaching for yourself! In the meantime, write me a comment on the blog, let me know what you did TODAY to break through a particular fear… even if it’s a small step, it doesn’t matter. A small step in the right direction is better than standing still and going nowhere.

Go for it!